1 - 20 of 1,738 Works in Absurd
Navigation
Listing Works
-
Tags
Summary
Sephiroth saw how much those bad thoughts were weighing down Cloud so he finally decided to fix things up! One messy brain session with Masamune later… now Cloud is giggly and cheerful; everything he wasn't before!
Today, Cloud begins the first day of his life from now on. They'll have a bath, dress up, get some food in their stomachs and then Sephiroth will bring him to a lovely Shinra garden!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,861
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 0
-
Tags
Summary
Before instigating his plan for world domination, Lord Voldemort had to impress the philanthropic blood purists of Wizarding Britain. Luckily for him, the Malfoy’s debutante ball presented the perfect opportunity.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,605
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 10
-
Tags
Summary
Dear Hot Bread God,
Please put me out of my misery and shove your yeasty fist up my pussy.
Signed,
Your dough, waiting to be pounded.
Um. Too desperate?
---
Rey is thirty, terminally single, and has been on enough bad Hinge dates to last several lifetimes. One evening, the Instagram algorithm delivers her something unexpected: a pair of extraordinary hands making bread, and a voice that tells her she's being oh so good.
She doesn't follow him. She's not going to be caught being horny on main.
She does, eventually, subscribe to his OnlyFans.
What follows is a completely rational series of decisions that leads her, one Saturday morning, across an international border, to eat pizza with a stranger from the internet.
Just lunch. Just to suss things out.
-
LOS AVENFELDS by Esenel1970
Fandoms: Seinfeld, The Sopranos (TV), Breaking Bad, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Kanye West (Musician), Iron Man (Movies), Multi-Fandom, Twin Peaks (TV 1990), Succession (TV 2018), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Rewrite del MCU. Tony Stark está muerto y Jerry Seinfeld es Iron-Man.
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤-═══════ι▬▬ -
Waifu Wars Independence Day Special by yazminaydem
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, 炎炎ノ消防隊 | Enen no Shouboutai | Fire Force (Anime), Final Fight (Video Game), Street Fighter, 対魔忍アサギ | Taimanin Asagi (Anime), Action Taimanin (Video Game), Black Lagoon (Anime & Manga), Yu-Gi-Oh the Abridged Series, イジらないで長瀞さん | Ijiranaide Nagatoro-san | Please Don't Bully Me Nagatoro (Anime), 葬送のフリーレン | Sousou no Frieren | Frieren: Beyond Journey's End - All Media Types, Akame ga Kill! (Anime & Manga), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, SPY x FAMILY (Anime), オーバーロード - 丸山くがね | Overlord - Maruyama Kugane, DearS
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
This July 4th, the waifus declare their independence from the plot and decide to BBQ instead—until their plans are ruined by an alien invasion led by none other than Esdeath from Akame ga Kill.
The Ice Queen slaps a massive ice dome over Neon City and declares dominion, then unleashes her army of DearS—normally cute, submissive alien girls now twisted into leather-and-latex dominatrixes.
And Midnight is pissed! Not about the invasion, but about the terrible kink etiquette on display.
This special takes the classic alien invasion trope and turns it into something campy, horny, and absurd, with the signature crack-treated-seriously tone and plenty of meta and fourth-wall breaking jokes.
Series
- Part 12 of The Waifuverse
-
SPY (Gojo Satoru) by Radamanthys314
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime & Manga), Spy (2015)
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Under the threat of a terrorist attack capable of shattering the nation's fragile peace, the secret organization NERV launches a desperate mission to recover a bomb before it falls into the wrong hands. The agent assigned to the operation is Gojo Satoru: a brilliant analyst with no real field experience, burdened by years of self-doubt and the shadow of the partner he once admired. Thrown into a world of espionage, false identities, deadly conspiracies, and absurd situations, Satoru must survive his first mission... and discover whether he has what it takes to become the spy the world needs.
-
Tags
Summary
已完稿，周更。
Weekly updates, purely random scribbles, terrible writing.
If Hitler had died in poverty in 1914, and Mussolini had been a mere bystander as the people put the corrupt Church to a fiery trial, how would the history of the 20th century have been rewritten?
In a world without Hitler and without World War I, would humanity have headed toward peace?
No, they would have fought over who got to judge the pedophile priests first. The blood of the 20th century wouldn't have flowed in the trenches — it would have flowed in St. Peter's Square.
An enraged mob crucified the Pope. The new Pope, to save his own skin, eagerly led the way to blow up the tombs of all previous popes. People from all over the world, carrying crosses on their shoulders, flooded into Rome. Amid the bickering over 'who gets to judge the pedophile priests first,' the revolution turned into an absurd refugee camp.
-
Mahoragas, metaphysics and gay men: welcome to Slander Kaisen by SukunaNo1Glazer
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime & Manga)
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
The Jujutsu world is in shambles; the higher ups are dead, Tokyo is destroyed, and Sukuna is running rampant in a teenager's body. The sorcerers fighting are not any better: Megumi summons Mahoraga at any chance, Gojo still yearns for a man long dead in an obviously PLATONIC way and Yuta is having sex with a cockroach, just to name a few. In short, everything is wrecked.
But everything changes when Sukuna summons Mahoraga while the other sorcerers are busy fighting an already dispatched one weeks ago. Because two Mahoragas can’t exist at the same time. The deviation causes a glitch in the world where all sorcery-related people start reviving, including Gojo’s dead best friend, Suguru Geto.
How will everyone live with the new world order? And how will everyone survive the unbearable tension between the two special grades?
-
Tags
Summary
Kevin thought the ocean was the only thing that could ever want him back.
After another night spiralling through shame, loneliness, and the crushing emptiness of celebrity, he walks into the sea fully expecting to disappear. Instead, he's dragged back to shore by Brooke McClellan-a stubborn marine conservationist who sees him as a person before she ever sees him as The Deep.
Now Kevin is trying to learn how to exist outside of The Deep. Brooke is trying to save a dying coastline. And somewhere between midnight dives, beach cleanups, awkward coffee conversations, and secrets that could ruin everything, they start building something terrifyingly real.
But you can only pretend to be normal for so long when the ocean itself knows your name.
-
Helldivers Star Patriots - Episode 3: Operation Hit Back II by DaveFrogDude
Fandoms: Helldivers (Video Games)
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Fireteam Beta is locked in battle with a giant terminid flyer, leaving them to use their wits rather than firepower to try and overcome this obstacle.
Series
- Part 3 of Helldivers Star Patriots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,063
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 6
- Hits:
- 10
-
Helldivers Star Patriots - Episode 2: Operation Hit Back by DaveFrogDude
Fandoms: Helldivers (Video Games)
27 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
After a lewd awakening, Otani is called to the bridge with the rest of the Helldivers to be sent to Oshaune to investigate a mysterious attack on a research facility. But there's something much bigger than Bile Titans.
Series
- Part 2 of Helldivers Star Patriots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,781
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 3
- Hits:
- 6
-
Helldivers Star Patriots - Episode 1: New Stars by DaveFrogDude
Fandoms: Helldivers (Video Games)
26 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Everything is hunky-dorey on planet Crucible with the completion of the World. Utility. Silo. System to transport Super Earth citizens across the globe. But something sinister lies underneath the in-development megacity that spreads havoc amongst the hard-working crowd, leaving only one thing to stand up against this subterranean menace.
Series
- Part 1 of Helldivers Star Patriots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,456
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 6
- Hits:
- 7
-
Tags
Summary
The Dewill Effect is a surreal sci-fi mystery adventure set in a world quietly rotting at the edges of reality. In the already strange city of Dewill, on one day a strange phenomenon took place and this started spreading across the entire world. Then the mayor of Dewill sends out detective Courtois and his chaotic companion Shanky travel across increasingly unstable towns to document the “mishappenings” infecting the world.
-
Stuck in the Bubble with You by DragonOpal
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
25 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Before anyone can separate at the end of Age of Ultron, the Avengers (and a drunken Loki) are abducted by feathered dragon aliens and forced to face deep, dark secrets and watch Disney movies. (Lion King, anyone?)
--------------------
(The Khaldi are my original race.) -
Today is a Dream Away: The Comic Adaptation ~ Prologue/Chapter One/Some Small Hope by JanetKWallace
Fandoms: Deltarune (Video Game)
25 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Alright, you folks asked for it*, so here's a comic adaptation of the epic first chapter of the cult-classic, award-winning** Deltarune fic "Today is a Dream Away", featuring Susie from the Deltarune series on her quest to take over the school to add some meaning to her life.
(*you didn't)
(**eh, I'll never earn a Pulitzer for this, but I'm having lots of fun with the concept)Series
- Part 8 of Deltarune's Cathartic AU
-
I'm Just a Boy in Love by Soferet_Autistit
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
25 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
“Cuz fit hot guys have problems too.
Don’t look at us, we’re not dancing for you.
Leave us alone, we have to twerk out our sad.
(Sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad.)”I clap my hands over my mouth to keep laughter from escaping. I can’t. The mental image of Baz twerking is in my head now and I’ll never be able to dig it out. And he’s in the shower. Fuck!
***
Or: After yet another argument, Simon overhears Baz singing in the shower. And then it keeps happening. And happening. How long can the boys keep acting like they hate each other and while using the Crazy Ex-Girlfriend soundtrack to sing their true feelings in the shower?
-
Tags
Summary
You have lived in poverty since you were born.
You found out a secret about your ancestor.
You try to enjoy a quiet normal life but the savage blood line also runs in your frame.
Perhaps trying to live a peaceful and useful life is very tough for you. -
Meeting with GOD turned wrong and now I have to survive in JJK by ObsceneWickedLunatic_or_just_an_OWL
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime & Manga), Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
24 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
I made a stupid joke to a GOD, so instead of a harem romance world I got sent to JJK with the objective of killing Sukuna, helped by a cruel [SLAVE DRIVER] personality system that secretly loves me? Which was created by ObseceneWickedLunatic_or_just_an_OWL™
-
Tags
Summary
«Introduction»
«I JUST WANTED TO GET BACK HOME AND DRINK MY HOT CHOCOLATE!! — famous last words by some idiot.» (I wrote down with a grin as I stared at the paper, which had tiny holes on after being tapped on for too long.) Finally. I found SOMETHING. (I looked at the clock.) Weeeell- (I sucked in a breath.) It’s 6 am. I forgot to sleep. But, THE DOCUMENTATION IS FINALLY OVER!! Wait a minute.Why am I trying to find a book description for my DIARY?
It’s… not like my diary is *ever* getting published. «You’re approaching the whole situation too negatively, my weaker self. I’d say make use of it. The documentation *itself* has many advantages. Your new status is just untapped potential.» (Iosif said.) UghhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHH!! IT WAS A FUCKING FRIDAY!! THIS NEW «STATUS» COSTED ME AN ENTIRE WEEKEND!! «You might hate it, but you’re learning how to be more *productive*, my weaker self.» (he added.) I hate this. I HATE YOU TOO.
Well, I hope, at least, nobody dies. «If you fulfill your duties well, they won’t. And, I believe in you. Now, get back to the documentation.»
No.
«Yes. Or, I’ll do it myself.»
Anything but that, UGH!! Fine. I will. Just don’t take «matters into your own hands.»
Series
- Part 1 of absolute İncompetence diaries
-
The Bead of Thrakatulûk-Dun by moritheil
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, British Writer RPF
23 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
The scholar in tweed peered curiously at the stall. He was quite well-traveled himself; he wasn’t even born in England, but in one of the colonies, between the Boer Wars. Now he was among the English scholars of Oxford, and sat in a well-worn booth at the Eagle and Child.
Plain. Dull. Unremarkable. Nothing caught his eye, except — a bead, polished, made of volcano glass or some other material.
“D’you like it? It’s nephrite. Jade, the locals call it.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 752
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 15